


Pretending To Sleep

by wibblyR



Category: Free!
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Missing Scenes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-18
Updated: 2014-10-18
Packaged: 2018-02-21 16:16:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2474489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wibblyR/pseuds/wibblyR
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haru has another epiphany in Australia.</p><p>Takes place during free! es episode 12, notably, the unseen flight and the hotel room.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretending To Sleep

**Author's Note:**

> Happy birthday, [Désirée](pressure-point-johnlock.tumblr.com) !  
> Probably the fluffiest, schmoopiest, cheesiest thing I have ever written.

Haru doesn’t know how he ended up on a 9-hour long flight to Australia.

Well, he knows how. Rin came to tell him he was taking him to Australia, Haru packed his things and followed him, and that’s how he’s here. He just doesn’t know why. It may have something to do with Rin not being Makoto. A part of Haru thought going out would do him good, but now the pressing questions he wants to ask Rin are added to the endless rewind of his fight with his best friend. He doesn’t dare back out now and he doesn’t dare open his mouth in fear that the anxiety and confusion will spill out in a flood.

Rin’s side of their silence is comfortable. He knows what he’s doing. Haru tries his best to put his unease at bay by putting his entire trust in Rin’s hands, and looks out the window on his right.

They’ve taken off for some time now and fly above a sea of clouds. Haru keeps looking out the window – not because this is his first time in a plane, although the new experience does draw a quiet thrill; he also doesn’t want to look at Rin so as not to elicit a need for conversation.

That worry turns out to be pointless when Rin shifts beside him, making his heart panic, and something hard falls on Haru’s shoulder. He turns his head and looks down, bewildered, at the mass of red hair that tickles him where his skin is naked, and Rin’s eyes closed, long eyelashes fretting in sleep. Haru breathes slowly so as not to wake him but Rin seems deep in slumber. _How long has he been sleeping ? He’s very quiet._

Haru checks his phone. They’ve taken off an hour ago. He’s too stressed to sleep like Rin, and decides to revise what little English he knows. The time it takes him is embarrassingly short, so he watches a movie in English for good measure. He still has several hours left, and with so much time and so few things to do, the white roll of the clouds manages to lull him and he dozes off.

He wakes up groggy and with a searing pain in his neck, but also with a very soft feeling on his cheek. He realizes his head rests on top of Rin’s silky pillow of hair. He sits up straight carefully, massaging the muscles connecting his neck to his shoulder. Rin’s whole body is turned towards him, their knees touching, but Rin’s hands are sagely gathered in his lap like a child. _Rin is cute_ , Haru finds himself thinking. He brushes away the strands of hair that always fall on Rin’s face and must tickle him. Without really meaning to, his fingers linger on Rin’s sleepy-warm face. He quickly gathers his hands between his knees too.

Less than an hour left. A peak of apprehension shoots up Haru’s stomach. He kind of wants to stay on the plane, all things considered. Rin is there, he tells himself again.

When Rin wakes up, as the masculine voice over the speakers announces they will land shortly, he comes to very quickly and gathers his things, putting his cap back on and ducking his head to the ground and away from Haru. That’s when Rin starts not to look at him.

He barely glances to see if Haru is following him and Haru tries to keep up with him, his figure his only point of anchor in this foreign land. Haru is embarrassed and annoyed by the vulnerability that threatens to overtake him if he loses sight of Rin. They don’t sit together in the bus either, because it is crowded, but Haru still feels a coolness coming from Rin and his hands are clammy. That distance… just like Makoto.

 

That’s why he freaks out when he’s left alone. And then it’s nothing, Rin is there, and he’s smiling, and sitting close to him and apologizing and talking to him. Haru strokes with a thumb the point of his heart in his chest.

 

By the time they arrive at the beach, Haru is thinking about Makoto again, because of Rin’s apologies. But Rin talks. Somehow, he draws Haru out by talking about himself. _He came here to think about me. He had the world open before him and he thought about me_. Rin’s silhouette dances like a buoy against the sun, his hair floating like bright seaweed in the air. The waves lick shoes of foam onto his feet. He is like me, Haru thinks. The thought is like something he had long forgotten.

 

Haru feels lost and small again when they’re with Russell and Lori. They are very nice, enticing but not overcrowding, but he still feels a barrier, not helped by Rin’s coldness, at odds with the ease with which he addresses his foster parents. Haru looks at the photos in the living room, his gaze drawn to them like he is drawn to the side Rin has shown him this afternoon. The more Haru learns about him and his experiences, the more he is fascinated by this world, so much bigger and more complex than he has known. He resents Rin a little for opening up and closing off so randomly.

 

He starts to withdraw into himself too when Rin angrily bursts at the single hotel bed. Haru doesn’t understand why Rin’s so upset, and doesn’t understand why he himself is upset. His stomach churns at the awkwardness of their sleeping positions, back to back and as far away as the bed will allow. Haru curls and curls into the sheets and into himself.

And then Rin speaks up.

“Hey, Haru ?”

Haru opens his eyes. Holds his breath.

“I told you I’ve always admired you, right ?”

Haru looks at his hands clutching the sheets close to him. The day passed in a blur, but he remembers that. He also remembers what Rin recalls next to him, bright flashes of memory shining with a sharp-toothed smile.

He realizes he could pretend to be asleep. Nothing would change.

“That’s why it’s hard for me when you’re not always there ahead of me, showing me the path I should take. Without you I have nothing to aim for, you know ?”

“I remember it too”, Haru manages to say.

That makes Rin roll on his back. Haru can feel the smile in his voice as he continues to reminisce, and his warmth seeps, so close to him. He doesn’t dare to turn.

“I knew for sure. That you were definitely going to enter the same world as me.”

Haru clenches his fist. He thought he followed Rin. Rin said he follows him. Maybe they could go forward together. Hand in hand.

“Hey Haru, during that race, didn’t you feel something too ?”

He turns on his other side.

Rin has shifted on his side towards him too, his hair splayed on the pillow. Rin’s eyes widen and he looks away, blushing.

“Rin”, Haru says very quietly.

Rin looks back at him. Their faces are close, and their hands, between them on the mattress, too.

“I do feel something”, Haru says more confidently than he feels.

Haru doesn’t know if he does it unconsciously or if he’s trembling that much, but he inches two fingers onto Rin’s. Rin automatically laces their fingers together, biting his lower lip. He’s almost as red as his hair.

“Don’t cry.”

“I won’t !” Rin mumbles, turning his face into his pillow.

Haru removes his hand from Rin’s grasp and brushes away the strands of hair in Rin’s face.

“You’re so beautiful”, he blurts out, surprising himself.

He puts a tentative hand on Rin’s waist. Rin immediately lunges and wraps his arms around him, pressing Haru to his chest. Haru stills, then relaxes into the embrace, closing his eyes against Rin’s shoulder. They are so very warm, the heat like tranquil waves bathing the two of them. Haru doesn’t mean to, but he falls asleep at once.

 

Haru wakes up still in the crook of Rin’s neck. He smells sweaty so Haru disentangles himself, but Rin clings to him and Haru sees he’s awake already, seems to have been for some time. He lays his head down again, his face inches from Rin’s. Rin smiles a shaky grin and Haru quickly kisses it off him. Rin looks at him, stunned, cheeks turning pink to red to crimson; he gets up energetically and almost runs to the bathroom.

“Lots of things to do today !” he shouts.

Haru laughs quietly into Rin’s pillow, feeling himself thrumming with bliss too.


End file.
